The Comfort Trap

2016-12-25 17.14.20

Well, it’s been almost half a year since I last updated this collection of my writings, last we spoke I’d recently thought I was getting drugged and robbed in the desert, and I had made a fool out of myself on that last leg of climbing a mountain. But overall, I lived in terror, trying but failing miserably from escaping my destiny of having to go back to Mexico.

Fortunately for me though, one of the several hundred job applications I’d sent out in the last few months actually bore fruit and I got an online interview. Unfortunately for me though, at the time I was in one of the hippiest hostels I’d ever been at, where it wasn’t uncommon to see the guests making opium tea and smoking pot whilst sometimes screaming about their drug use to anyone in earshot.

Needless to say, this wasn’t the ideal place to have an interview at; but I managed to find a corner of a room where I more or less pretended everything was in order, and it all went according to plan.

Fast forward a couple months, where I had to go back to Mexico for the UK visa and I’m finally back in London working as a financial journalist. It took over a year of struggling, applying to dozens of jobs per day (with the final tally being upwards of 800!) but it worked out, despite having essentially given up at one point. To say I’m ecstatic does not begin to cover it, not only did I beat the odds but managed to come out on top as well.

There was certainly a sizeable portion of luck involved but this would’ve been close to impossible without putting considerable amount of effort on my end as well. I guess this the key to life: to take enough punches and keep fighting until you get a lucky break.

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It ain’t all Sunshine and Rainbows

laughs-in-illegal

I think I’m done. At this point I have sent well over 750 job applications, hoping beyond hope that something would work. This is not exaggeration or allegory, I have genuinely sent almost a thousand applications over the last two months. Reason being that I do not want to go back to Mexico.

It’s not that I hate everything associated with it, just that I never felt at home there. The urgency and avoidance of it might make me melodramatic whenever I talk about life there. Its values and concerns always felt alien to me, so I always felt like the odd one out. I’ve made a true human connection over the last few years living in Europe. I’ve felt free to live life, explore sides of myself I didn’t know existed, and for the first time, I truly think that I’ve found who I am meant to be as a person. I can honestly say that for the last few years I’ve been of the happiest men alive.

Furthermore, I’ve always had the philosophy that if you’re persistent enough, you get what you want. That said, there are also natural limits to one’s actions – I can’t jump to the moon, no matter how hard I try. This immutable fact will not change, even if I dedicate the next lifetime to mastering my jumping technique.

Continue reading “It ain’t all Sunshine and Rainbows”