Healthy Drama – what all relationships need

 

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Recently I had but a brief facebook spat, wherein a lady said that when a man is told by their partner that they should “do what they want” guys should do the exact opposite and not do so, and listen and do what the woman wants. I pointed out that this would essentially give women absolute control over anything that happens in the relationship, as women would ultimately have unlimited veto power. Not only would this permanently skew the relationship power dynamic to women fully, but a man would be at their beck and call.

I would argue, as a man who has interest in the task of attracting girls, that the fairer sex does not want this. They might think they do, but they don’t. Now, it might initially seem patronising for a man to seem to dictate what women want, but I’m not doing so in the slightest. You ask a fisherman how to fish, not the fish; as the fisherman is privy to patterns that the fish is not.

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Tinder Bender – Why you shouldn’t do online dating

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Estimated Time: 3 minutes

Trapped in a small community during university time, where everyone is seeking to protect their social standing and hierarchy makes dating difficult. Nowadays I have no problem whatsoever with walking up to a woman and saying that she’s beautiful. Sometimes you get told to fuck off, sometimes you have the romance of a lifetime, but both situations have two things in common – they’re honest and quick.  You know what is the exact opposite? Tinder.

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The Unconscious Horror – Learning to follow your passions and be free

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Estimated Time: 4 Minutes

As a homo sapiens, we’re part of various interlocking systems that are barely understandable to our limited minds. Even if we fail to see it, we’re a replaceable cog in a vast unconscious, unfathomably complex machine. A select few may be lucky enough to hear and acknowledge the constant low whirring of the engine, but none of them really know its true purpose or end goal.

Our biology has primed us to be likely to do and make us believe in certain things – to follow our evolutionary imperative. We’re a machine whose purpose seems to be to make copies of itself to be passed on to the next generation. In the meantime, we’ve allied with other such machines to take over the planet, and we have decided that the best way to do so is by sharing certain behavioural patterns that are designed for stability and social welfare.

The interesting thing is that much like evolution, society is not particularly concerned with the wellbeing of its individual components – it’s an unconscious mechanism that seeks to perpetuate itself at all possible costs. It doesn’t matter whether you’re happy or sad, as long as the system evolves and manages to survive and perpetuate itself to the next generation. It’s not to say that society won’t congratulate you for following the rules, it’s just that looking at it objectively the rewards hardly seem to be worth the cost. To quote Napoleon “A soldier will fight long and hard for a bit of colored ribbon.”

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Children of an Empire – or why immigration is done wrong

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241 – that is a number that at present terrifies me. It’s the number of days that I have on my student visa at the time of writing this article. When the timer runs out, I’ll be kicked out of the UK. For the last 3 years I’ve been happily living in Europe. It’s been a lifelong dream of mine to do so, and I’ve enjoyed it thoroughly. It’s the first time in my life where I feel like I belong somewhere.

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Date Stalemate I – The Former Slave

Sometimes in the world of the bizarre and wonderful, you end up meeting the oddest people on dates. This ongoing segment will highlight some of the more interesting ones that I’ve had the pleasure, or displeasure of experiencing. I hope you enjoy them as much as I do.

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A year and a half ago, I had an internship in an investment bank in Madrid. I think they vastly overestimated my experience for I was given enormous responsibility, and I had never as much as been a burger flipper in McDonald’s. I ended up proving their trust to be wise in the end, and they thought my work to be of superb quality. Yet during those two months of working in Madrid, I was terrified that my boss would walk up to my desk one afternoon and angrily say that I was a fraud and a hack, that I should pack up my things and leave.

It’s with such preoccupations that I walked around the Puerta del Sol in Madrid – a beautiful esplanade at the heart of the former Spanish Empire. The sun was beaming on the colonial style buildings, but I had little mental real estate to spare to appreciate it. Facts, figures, and charts of the Spanish finance sector were being bounced around my brain. Nevertheless, as comedian Robin Williams put it, the problem is that man was given a brain and a penis, but only enough blood to run one at a time.

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Lusting for Love – Why People are Unhappy with their Love Life

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I’ve been reading Casanova’s autobiography as of late. It’s multiple volumes worth of his life adventures. In a lot of respects I admire him, as he was rarely afraid to stand against the tide and live the life he wanted. All too often we get caught on labels and forget to see things as they are.

We call him a womaniser yet simultaneously forget that he fell for a good number of the 133 girls he ended up with. I don’t think seduction is mutually exclusive with affection. There is a time and place for either one. Guys, contrary to all stereotype, get much too fixated in affection before sex. I think that’s our gender’s little secret. Whether we admit it or not, we can have a perfectly self sufficient sex life with the internet, we can see more naked women in an hour than the most depraved Roman Emperor in a lifetime. What we can’t get is affection, that is our true vice.

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Mediocrity’s Waterloo – why you should learn to be yourself

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Estimated reading Time : 4 min

The thunderous roar of the cannon signalled the start of the battle. Napoleon had once more decided to take the Belgian countryside by storm, and only Wellington was there to stop him. The British audience cheered as Wellington smugly rode on the field, but the French booed loudly. An audience of fifty thousand people had descended upon Waterloo to mark the 200th anniversary of the famous battle, and see five thousand soldiers in full martial gala take to arms.

It’s well among the oddest of things I’ve done in my life. The whole experience had such a surreal undertone.In normal life,  you can rarely even mention the name of Napoleon without hearing something along the lines of “wasn’t he like a really short dictator, or something?” but here we had fifty thousand nerds that could quote you napoleonic minutia at the drop of a bicorn hat. I’ve been to football games before – dragged there more like. Yet, for the first time ever, I understood that feeling that football fans have when being with fellow fans.

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